Rejoice and believe in the Gospel, the ‘good news’! Today I examine the question ‘what is so good about it’!

Imagine a woman suffering from an incurable illness with 3 young children at home. Suppose one day the doctors found a cure for her, can you imagine the doctor running to meet her shouting enthuasiastically ‘Good news, good news’!!

Well the only reason it’s good news is that she already knows the bad news, that she’s dying!

But imagine if the same lady denied the fact that she’s ill and the doctor said to her ‘good news, good news’! She’d simply brush him off saying ‘i’m not sick, leave me alone’!

In the Gospels we can see that there was no sign of people who didn’t believe in God. Spirits and demons and all that type of stuff was normal and even king Herod believed so much in spirituality that he went out of his way to try to get Jesus killed!

I’m not aware of a single example of Jesus meeting an atheist….I might be wrong!

And so these people were aware of God, aware of good and evil….and so the message of the Gospel (forgiveness, love and mercy) came as good news.

In today’s world the majority seem to be some sort of cross between athesists and a cocktail of different spiritualities. If we were all dogs, I think we’d see a lot of cross breds or mungrels with a bit of atheism and a pinch of christianity with a spice of new age to liven things up!

But because in general people just aren’t bothered, like the lady in denial of her illness, the ‘good news’ of the Gospel is rejected as the bad news of superstitious men!

And so my dear friends, for Jesus to be good news, we need to acknowledge firstly the bad news, we are broken sinners in need of doctor Jesus’ cure!

When I asked Jesus in prayer today what hurts him the most.. what came into my heart was the word “indifference”.

Then I felt him tell me….look at the efforts human beings go to be perfect, look at the hours in the gym, the pain sweat and tears, look at the hours spent on external beauty such as hair and makeup….look at the hours spent shopping not to mention the money…

Then look at the suffering that people will go through to be beautiful…all types of surgery, taking bits off, adding bits on.. operations after operations. Thousands and thousands spent at the dentist…teeth whitening, braces, implants…

And then when it comes to the realm of the soul…almost nothing…

Too much to pray the rosary, too much to go to mass, too much to pray the divine mercy…

Too much to go to confession, too much to seek inner healing, too much to mortify one’s passions…

Too much..

And so why do people who can spot a wrinkle from a distance of 10 metres and pick out a grey hair from nothing get so insulted if one tells them that their soul needs work?

Why do those who dress immaculately fail to look at themselves in the mirror and ask some obvious questions.

How do people think that they will reach spiritual perfection with no effort when every human perfection requires tremendous effort?!

And so goes on…

The answer, blind indifference and utter spiritual irresponsibility.

Maybe today pray for those who just don’t care, for the grace of maturity and conversion of hearts and wills.

Have a nice day!

–

Ever walk around and wonder ‘what is the point?’.

What’s the point in going to mass or praying? What’s the point in trying to live a life of purity? What’s the point of it all especially when it seems like those who throw caution to the wind often seem happier! Wouldn’t it be easier if somehow your conscious could be amputated!!

Well if you have’t, I certainly have!

But as I prayed about if I felt Jesus say to me that it’s like asking somebody who is young why they are already putting money away for their retirement!

I guess it’s because this was my old job that God uses this as an example but it’s true! To have a good pension at age 65 most people start putting money aside as soon as they start work. Over 40 or so years it builds up to a nice lump sum that is then used to enjoy a nice retirement!

And so when it comes to prayer we can use the same example. To the unspiritual man, your prayers and rosaries and fasts are a waste and your morals and belief are a joke… but just like the young man who thinks that he’ll never get old, when he reaches 65 he has a rude awakening!

Those people that do not make any effort to pray and decide somehow that they’ll throw themselves at God’s mercy at the last minute are a bit like the man that didn’t save for his retirement!

Now God being God and desiring to save everybody will of course save these people if they desire but they’ll live their eternel retirement a little like someone with no pension but state benefits!

The cure of Ars often spoke of this fact, that our degree of glory in the next life depends on how much effort we put in down here!

And so today if you are feeling crushed or hopeless or asking yourself if any of this has any point, take a step back and think of your eternal retirement in heaven and cast your mind to the lives of the saints who gave up all down here to have all up there!

Recently someone asked me ‘how can a loving God make a place called hell and force people or angels to go there if they don’t love him’?

It sounds like a good question and as usual God is the bad guy!

I guess the answer lies in one word “freedom”. What does it mean? What is it?

Years ago when I used to see demons all the time, I asked Jesus about this and as usual his response silenced me!!

Being God, God knew before creating Satan that Satan would rebel. To use a human analogy, God wasn’t looking at the cinema screen wondering how the thriller would end! No, God is the producer, He knows the ending!!

So my next question was: Why did you make Satan if you knew that He would disobey and by doing so destroy himself?!

And He replied: LOVE. I made him because I still loved Him and I gave him life and love like I did to everybody!

So then I guess we must go back to the word ‘freedom’! Personally I think people misunderstand and misuse this word. Usually those that have suffered a lot come to a deeper understanding.

Freedom suggests boundless choices without consequences. I’ll eat what I like, I’ll go where I like, I’ll wear what I like, I’ll say what I like…..and if others don’t like it, they can @#$@$@$@**$#!!

But God’s version of freedom is different. We are only partially free. We had no choice to be born or what colour eyes we’d have. In order to stay alive on earth we are bound by millions of laws. We need to breathe, we can’t survive if it’s too hot or too cold, we must eat and only certain things suit us, cows can eat grass for example but we can’t. It’s mindblowing how restricted we are!

Now if we choose to live within these rules we can in theory live to a ripe old age! But if we go outside these rules we choose to go against our nature and when we do that we get sick. Taking food as an example, how many people suffer from heart problems and other health problems from unhealthy eating not to mention those that starve to death in the world’s poorest countries?

And so when it comes to spirituality, why do very educated people who have no problem with the physical laws put in place by God react so badly to the same God who has made the spiritual rules?!

And just as respecting and obeying the physical rules leads to healthier and happier lives, why do people think that it’d be any different for the spiritual laws ?!

To stay physically alive we have to eat, to stay spiritually alive we have to pray! What’s the big deal? Another word for prayer that is considered cool nowadays is ‘meditation’ and it’s being recommended by people all over the world, even athesists because even the simpleton can see that our minds need a break.

Now if a psychiatrist recomnends meditation for €100 a pop, he’s great! If a catholic recomnends prayer for free, he’s a fool!!

And so going back to the loving God who throws people in hell we can see that God made us without our choice or help and we can’t undo this part. God desires us to get to heaven by simply choosing to respect the framework that he put in place but just like the person that refuses to stop eating fatty foods and ends up dying of a heart attack, those that obstinately refuse to cooperate with the spiritual laws in effect choose to throw themselves into hell.

And so we can conclude that God is a loving God who knows what is good for us and what will make us healthy and any being, man or angel, that decides to do their own thing and ignores God chooses hell.

Fortunately, God is merciful and even after a lifetime of rebellion one can still make it to heaven by one simple but sincere act of the mind and will “Lord, have mercy on me a sinner”!

Hello everybody from Split in Croatia! Yet another new beginning, new city, new country…..and check out the view!!

The bus journey here was exhausting and the little things like finding accomodation etc. quite testing.

And so here I am sort of trying to settle and adjust to new surroundings reflecting on the folly of my life and the madness of God!

I read once upon a time in a mental health magazine that one shouldn’t do too many stressful things in any year for fear of breaking down. Out of a limit of 10 (breaking point) I gave up counting my score at over 30! Clearly God didn’t agree!!

And so if i can bore you by thinking as I write, Ireland to France to India to Australia to Ireland to France to Spain to Bosnia to Croatia….not to mention the moves in between….Paris, Lyon, Toulon, Central France, Pondicherry, Kerela, Canberra, Sydney, Clare, Ennis, Chareleville, Limerick, Medjugorje….

Not to mention the places in between!! Not bad for 10 years especially for a person who has never particularily enjoyed travelling!!

The first Bible verse ever I read was Matthew 10 when Jesus sends his disciples out and told them to move from town to town, trusting in HIM for everything. As an international business planning actuary who was already worrying about his retirement I was certainly a very unlikely canditate for such an “off the wall calling”. Before leaving ten years ago I visited my parents and said to my younger brother

“Next week i’m going to do something and you will all think that I’m crazy”

They say that a sign that you are not Mad (big M) is that you know that you are mad (small m)!!

Ten years later I have been examined by psychiatrists all over the world, France, Australia and Ireland. After a 3 month consultatation with the chief psychiatrist in munster during which I shared every spirirual experience that I’ve had I was given the all clear with an absolute guarantee that i had no signs whatsoever of mental illness. When I told my parents this they were so angry that I had to move out of ‘home’ and almost found myself homeless.

And so a bit tired from travelling, a bit tired from hearing constant criticisms on my character I wonder why? Why do people judge me? Why do they mock me? Why do they not believe me even when doctors and experts all over the world have given me the all clear?!

Perhaps they think that I have no feelings, perhaps they think that I find this calling easy, perhaps they think I’m mistaken..

But you know, people like me suffer a lot, an awful lot. It is not easy to be called to living such a different life. It is not easy to wake up in foreign lands tired and weary with almost no money and to turn on your phone and to face further criticism, especially from people who claim to follow Jesus.

And so folks, maybe I write a bit tongue and cheek but perhaps this comes from years and years and years of fighting to be believed, accepted and respected.

For those of you who do not like my blog, that is ok but I ask you not to judge me. You do not know me, you have not walked in my shoes and while I’m not perfect, I am doing my best.

And for those, the few, who show love, support and compassion. Thank you. I do not find my life easy and without you I would have thrown in the towel years ago.

God bless you all. Please pray for me that I may love Jesus more and heal more from the effects of all this.

Have a holy day

Michael

‘We are all born originals but many die copies’ is an expression that I heard once. We need only look at the angelic smile of an infant bany to see the boundless world of freedom that exists in their spirits!

But as we ‘grow up’, society and culture tie us down with does and don’ts. ‘You can’t go there….you are not good enough for that….you will never succeed….you have to do this’.

And soon, so soon we become tied down and stuck with jobs we don’t like, mother in laws we don’t like, houses and mortgages we don’t like. Our lives are being run for us like a train that was put on a track without us even being consulted!!

When I was 23 I began to think for myself. As I sat in a hotel room in Goteberg Sweden a day after qualifying as an actuary I said to myself “what the hell am I doing”. I had previously lived with my auntie who had spent her life working in the bank and I didn’t want to waste the next 30 years of my life and end up miserable and sour like her! But I felt trapped, utterly trapped.

And so I decided to make a break by emigrating to France, a disasterous move from a career point of view but I didn’t care. I was just good at maths, as far as being an actuary went or working in insurance I did not give one hoot!

I decided that I’d be me. I didn’t want to waste my life. However it’s only once you start going against the current that you realise just how difficult it is to be yourself and how strong the current actually is. You soon realise that all the people who loved you now are afraid of you and one by one turn their backs on you. Out of 20 you may have 1 or 2 that stay.

And so the journey of freedom begins and the greatest battle is actually the one in your own head and heart!

In this boxing match for my freedom I was knocked out in the first round!! Unprepared I broke down!

But as I wrote previously, every breakdown can become a breakthrough and perhaps the greatest breakthrough for us all to realise is that there is somebody who wants us to be us and to be free even more than we want it! And that person is God!

The day that you realise that God is on your side is like the day popeye discovered spinach!! Prayer becomes your food, the Bible your inspiration and Jesus your strength.

And so I discovered prayer. I have no shame in admitting that I eat, sleep and breath prayer. I used to run accross Paris to get to mass on time, I’ve walked miles because in prayer and especially in the eucharist you’ll find a source of strength that will allow you to do the impossible.

Many of you reading this are perhaps “grown up” and your dreams may have died 30 years ago but remember with God it’s never too late. Others are just starting out and are wondering whether to follow your dreams or be sensible.

And so the choice is our own. Personally I’ve chosen to be me, to be different. If some think I’m insane that’s ok because the day I die I can smile at my God and say “I was me and it was all thanks to you”!!

Jesus is inviting you today to be you, to be the ball of love that He created you to be. He doesn’t want you depressed or anxious, worried or afraid. He is holding out His divine hand and opening His divine vault of treasures and saying

“Come on; you can do it, believe in me and I will help you, today is the first day of the rest of your life, let the past go, forgive all those who hurt you and let’s begin again together”!

Bless

Me!!

This morning like every morning (and evening) I went to mass. At the offetory I heard the voice of the Holy Spirit ask me to pray for those people considering suicide and later felt to write about it.

I recall years ago watching a well known irish film called ‘the field’. While I don’t remember it all I do recall that the oldest son had committed suicide and was buried outside the graveyard.

In my own life as I contemplated suicide I asked myself some of those common questions we all ask, namely if one commits suicide will they automatically go to hell?

The patron saint of priests was asked this question by a poor woman who’s husband had drown himself by jumping off a bridge into a river. His reply was interesting…

“Between the bridge and the river God would surely have given him time to repent”!

In my own case and from dealing with people who have come close to suicide or attempted it I have always thought the same. People find themselves at times so beaten down and desperate that at times they give in. But considering their free will is comprimised, God in His mercy and justice will indeed give them another chance.

And so one day Our Lady spoke to me about this. What she said is both interesting and profound and brings us back to the need for prayer:

“My dear child. Today I speak to you of a subject that you know all to much about – suicide.

Suicide is a very grievous offense towards God because it rejects the very thing that God gave you and that is His most precious loving gift to you – life!

The eternal father weeps as He sees His little children take their lives. He sees their agony, He sees their despair and He sees how this selfish society has often marginalised them and pushed them to the edge.

While suicide in itself is grievously offensive to God, in most cases the person who commits this act carries a far less portion of the responsibility. Abuse, illness, failures in the society and in the Church means that many souls who do not wish to die finish in desperation by taking their lives.

God is a merciful God and He sees the circumstances around these deaths. Most of these souls choose God’s light and are saved from eternal damnation. Only souls that obstinately refuse God’s mercy go to hell.

Nonetheless these souls need prayer as does their families. Carry the light and love of God to these broken families. Speak of His infinite mercy, compassion and justice and allow your tongue to bring healing to a broken world.

I bless you,

Our Lady, Queen of Peace.“

And so Our Lady is by no means minimising the seriousness of suicide but yet we see that there is even hope after that!

So if you know of somebody who has taken their life, pray for them with trust in God’s mercy and if you know somebody who is struggling and you suspect may be contemplating suicide, why not reach out with a nice word or a smile? You might not heal them but you may well give them the strength they need to live one more day. Perhaps our greatest error at times is to try to fix people rather than just loving them in their brokenness.

And perhaps as you read this, you yourself are struggling to stay afloat. Don’t be afraid, God does love you, He is not punushing you. Trust blindly in the impossible while taking things one day at a time.

Bless

Michael

As my time in Sarajevo draws to an end I prayerfully reflect on what I’ve learnt through the experiences that I’ve had and the people that I’ve met here.

Perhaps one word could summarise it all; family.

People yearn for family, a safe place where they are accepted, respected and understood.

However, something else equally striking is that I didn’t meet a single person who had found this family in their family of origin!

Drawing from my own life I can only understand too well this dynamic. The second of six kids I am stranger to these people. I have an older brother Senan who last I heard is working in London. After contacting him several times and receiving no reply I felt God telling me to let go. My sister Kathleen sends me an odd message like at Christmas or easter. I have two younger brothers; David and Rea. David to be fair sends me an odd hello while I’ve never heard from Rea. The best is Niamh, the youngest. She is studying to be a doctor so my parents are very happy with her. As for my parents, they have never accepted my new life and take no interest. My mum speaks on the telephone but it’s like talking to a brick wall of indifference. My Dad, he never speaks. I do not know him.

Perhaps God has allowed this in my life to help me better understand the pain, isolation and rejection of those I meet and also to redirect them to a new family, the family of God.

In my own experience, the more the world rejects you the more God draws near. I could never give Our Lady enough credit or thanks for how much she helps me. She is a mother in every sense of the word, always loving and encouraging me to be me, even if that means being different! Considering how different her own son was, is it any wonder Our Lady has a special place in her loving heart for those who don’t fit in!

Family also becomes the people we meet. Many times I’ve sat in coffee shops all over the world with tears running down my face despite doing my best to hold them back. The rejection of life too much to contain . And yet so very often a stranger smiles at me or a young child waves and somehow a drop of hope enters my spirit!

And then every now and then I meet some people who accept me as I am. Not successful Michael but broken crushed Michael whom the world and Church has trampled on. To me, these people are family, they are brothers, they are sisters. They are the family of God.

And so today as I reflect I have come to accept that my family is big, my family is vast, my family is full of interesting and broken people who hang out on street corners and pubs and clubs. My family is the poor, the wanderers, the rejected, the unwanted, the sick and the different!

And so I thank God for my new family and I hope that I too may be a blessing to them. To my old family I say “don’t worry about my funeral expenses, bury me in a McDonald’s cup if that day comes, sorry to have shamed you”!

After 3 weeks in Sarajevo, Bosnia, one can’t help but be surprised by the number of coffee shops! There is one everywhere and because it’s quite cold, they are all full! Cheers!

So feeling a little tired and worn out yesterday I sat down alone watching the world go by. After 10 minutes a gentleman in his 60’s sat beside me and began to chat. If I’m honest I wasn’t in the mood because usually people ask me what I do in life and 90% of the time I get ridiculed which causes more pain and hurt to add to the overflowing chalice!!

First thing he asks: what are you doing here? Jesus I love you but sometimes I feel like strangling you. I smiled and told him that He probably wouldn’t believe me and sipped my tea and took a deep breath.

I asked him if he knew of Medjugorje. It might be an ice breaker that may help explain to him what exactly it is that I do. O yes, before I could finish my sentence he told me that Medjugorje was a money making scam from the lazy but smart people of Herzegovena. Now just a little geography here, technically Medjugorje is in Herzegovena while Sarajevo is in Bosnia but often on a map you’ll see it all marked “Bosnia and Herzegovena” and let’s not talk about neighbouring Croatia where they all speak the same language but you must not say that bosnian and croatian are the same language just as you wouldn’t say australian and american are the same right?!! Mad!!

So back to my friend who thinks Medjugorje is a hoax run by lazy crooks. Was he going to add me to the list of lazy crooks parasiting off the naivity of others? If he was, he’d be joining a long list of people who haven’t yet added me to their Christmas card list!

Eventually I gave him a 60 second synopses of what it is that I’m doing after which he quickly, almost too quickly asked me how I liked Sarajevo!! Clearly he had no interest in talking about God and if I’m honest, neither did I!!

Not letting him off the hook quite so easily though I did ask him in between trivial smalltalk if he believed in God. He proudly told me that he was an atheist although He was open to the idea of life after death !

Anyway I didn’t pursue it as I wasn’t on form but afterwards it did make me think

– How can intelligent people be so uninterested in whether God exists?

– How can intelligent people speak of life after death and yet pay no attention to how that might work. I mean, is it not just a little presumtuous to assume you’ll stroll into eternal life without giving it a second thought down here?!

– While many use the expression ‘life after death’. Would they be better considering also the expression ‘death after life’?!!

In any case I was quite happy when this man left. I settled back in my chair and after saying a few ‘hail mary’s ‘ for him enjoyed the rest of my coffee!!

Maybe today you’ll find yourself somewhere and talking to a stranger! Perhaps our greatest challenge at times is to share our faith even when we know that it may be challenged and when we see no visible fruits only perhaps the contrary!!

God, strengthen us to be your witnesses in a sceptical world!