When it comes to healing how often do we say to God “how long”?
And usually in the tone of “because I’ve got a busy life and haven’t got time for this setback”!
I was one of these people and I roamed from therapist to therapist where the ‘magic number’ was 6 weeks!
Of course 6 weeks became 12 weeks and 12 became 18 and so on and so on!
When eventually years went by I gave up and this is what God needed!
I said “who cares, I give up my agenda, my timeline, my ambitions and I give the lot to God”!
Bang! My life changed!
You see up to that point I was trying to fit God into my agenda!
I wanted to keep my job as an actuary, keep my volvo car and salary and I wanted God to heal me of anxiety so that I could enjoy it!
In return I would be a nice person, go to mass on a Sunday, throw a few euro to the poor and have a great life!!
Sounds like a great plan right? How could God not be delighted with that?!
Well let me tell you that God wasn’t happy at all with this plan because it was my plan and it was not His plan!
I wasn’t willing to give Him my career, my car, my security, my reputation! I wanted to keep all that and then throw Him a few crumbs in the form of leftover cash and an hour on a Sunday morning!!
So God had to crack me more! Why? Because He’s horrible and mean?
NO! Because God had a far better plan for me than sitting behind a desk in a stuffy office with people I didn’t like working with figures that meant nothing to me!
However in order to embrace God’s plan I needed to let go of mine and it took time for me to see that my plan wasn’t so good after all!
Now today you might be in the same position. You may be asking God “how long” and have your own plan and agenda!
God on the other hand may be waiting and also asking you “how long”?
“How long will you keep asking me how long?”
“How long will you keep holding onto your own plan?”
“How long till you realise that I have a far better plan for you?”
“How long till you trust me more?”
“How long till you surrender ALL of your life to me?
And so today dear friends, ask God for the grace to let let go of the ‘how longs’ and to surrender all your plans and projects to Jesus, even the ones that seem good!!
At the end of the day none of these things matter as the only thing that we will bring from this life to the next of any worth is our love and trust in God!
Have a great day
Padre Pio, pray for us on your feast today that like you we may come to know and accept the will of God for our lives and their in find the peace and happiness that we are so desperately seeking!