Good morning!

Yesterday Our Lady gave us a little teaching on being an apostle of love and as adapting this as a missionary style.

At the start it might even seem confusing if we have been used to handing out rosaries and bibles etc. so in this blog I want to clarify a few things!

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Tomorrow is the feast of Saint Therese of the child Jesus and as she is the patron saint of missionaries, she’s the ideal saint to help us with being apostles of love.

Therese had a very simple spirituality, talking to Jesus as a familiar friend from the heart (just as Our Lady asks in Medjugorje) and offering all her pains and sufferings and misunderstandings for others while loving Jesus in the Eucharist!

She desired to travel the entire world as a missionary and little did she know that her wish would come through after her death.

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Here is a prayer I picked up yesterday at the Carmelites in anticipation for tomorrows feast day. Let’s all pray with expectant faith!

So getting back to being an apostle of love. What it doesn’t mean is being friends with everyone and never talking about Jesus or mass or the rosary etc.

And it certainly doesn’t mean going around hugging people like the easter bunny and saying “I love you”!!

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No! What it means is getting to know people and love people and bit by bit over time to teach them about Jesus at the right pace.

Take my friend Peter for example. While I post on Facebook and here many pictures of us laughing and joking when we meet we talk a lot about God.

Actually only last night when I was returning the clothes that he lent me for the party we had a wonderful conversation about the suffering that some of his friends that I saw at the party had been through.

As he shared I pondered on the enormous need that they would have to be loved and healed and how jumping in with “Jesus loves you” could put salt on the already very painful wounds of their lives.

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Anyway as I was going I gave Peter the prayer card to Saint Therese and explained to him who she is. I’ve also given him a miraculous medal which he wears around his neck and also a copy of Mirjana of Medjugorje’s book “My heart will triumph”.

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And as he shares with me about his friends pain and sufferings I will pray for them when I go to mass today that they may be touched by Jesus and ask God if there is any way that I can reach out to them in love!

Similarly as we went along to the party the other day (which was not a wedding I must clarify). It wasn’t to show our support for people who don’t know God and live lives without him but it was to show our love for Peter and to bring the love of God to these people!

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And you may ask if it worked?

Well here is the funny bit! Peter is very very sociable and extremely forward and he has told every single one of his friends about this Michael who loves Jesus and has visions and so many of them are really interested and perplexed and want to come to our church to find out more!

You see, Peter is becoming an apostle of love already!!

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And so you see that this way of loving people and befriending people starts with the inside and works with the person at a gentle pace.

It’s not about converting people because that’s God’s job. It’s about loving them, caring for them, sharing for them, praying for them and helping them.

Peter and others in similar situations may never become catholics or go to mass or confession before he dies but will this stop Jesus having mercy on him like the good thief beside Jesus on the cross?

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And so you see Our Lady is asking us to love and to trust in Jesus for the rest because only God sees the hearts of people and their circumstances.

I could tell you hundreds more stories like Peter’s of people over the years that I’ve met from those that thought I was nuts to those that came to mass with me and prayed with me but as I said, love comes and afterwards people are entirely free to take on board what I’ve told them or not!

And so today let’s pray to both Our Lady of Medjugorje and to Saint Therese of the Child Jesus that we may be the missionary apostles of love as as they would like.

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May the Holy Spirit fill us with supernatural love and mercy for our mission and may we be empowered and enlightened by the Holy Spirit and His many gifts and charisms so as to bring the love and healing of Jesus to as many hurting hearts as possible.

Blessings to all!

Michael

This morning Our Lady spoke to me about being an apostle of love. This is a term that she uses a lot in Medjugorje in recent years but what does it mean?

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“My little ones,

Over the last while I have been teaching you about my love and the love of Jesus for each and every person and how through prayer you can become more and more filled with that love which you can then share with others.

Yes my children, I want you to be apostles of love, not just human love which although nice lacks power but apostles of the supernatural life-changing love of Jesus.

Supernatural love touches the hearts. People will share their deepest secrets to you, they will cry in your presence, they will listen to your words and you in turn will bring them to Jesus and to me.

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My children, you must be like a man going to a well and filling his bucket with water and then going out to water the dying plants. When his bucket is empty he must come back for more water and rest a bit himself before refilling and going out again!

And so too must you my little ones! You must rest and recharge and then you must go out again and again.

I lead you by the heart. The hurting and broken souls of this world thirst to be heard, for their wounds to be healed, for their pain to be released.

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Some may never convert and come to church but you must still love them and listen to them and pray for them. Do not judge from outward appearance or get disheartened by the lack of visible fruits because changes in the heart are far more lasting and important even if less visible.

As you reach out in love across boundaries and love people whom you may have never loved or even spoken to before you will learn so much about God’s very great love and mercy for yourselves and this will be a very great source of grace and healing for your own souls.

The more you live the gospel, the more you will experience its supernatural joy!

This is all I will say today my children. Open your hearts wide and let me lead you.“

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As I reflect myself on this I see that Our Lady sent Séamus and myself from Medjugorje as her apostles of love before we really knew that this is what we were doing!!

She sent us to Mostar, Dubrovnik, Sarajevo and finally to Split for a year before coming to London.

She didn’t send us out with anything except love! We met so many people from the gay community including one called Toni who you all know now.

We prayed with people, we cried with people, we reassured people of God’s love for them and we shared the love of Jesus with them.

Some didn’t understand what we were doing because we weren’t going out and distributing bibles or Holy medals or rosaries and we weren’t dressed any differently to anybody else.

Our Lady wanted us to blend right in and to meet people with our hearts and surprise them with Our love for Jesus.

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And so today let us open wide our hearts and pray that we can be Our Lady’s apostles of love be sharing her love to people who might never have experienced it before and leaving the results to Jesus!

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Michael

Good morning to all!

Tomorrow will be the beautiful feast of the Archangels and of course Michael is my favourite and not just because of my name! He’s got me out of many a scrape over the years and despite what people might think, angel Michael is great fun and not just a guy with a sword

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At times people forget that not only do the angels help us but that they love us! They too have emotions and feelings and free will and they are not like soldiers standing outside Buckingham palace forbidden to smile!!

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For reasons only known to God in my life I’ve been privileged to have a lot of experiences of angels and if there is one thing that always strikes me about them it’s their love and joy and their desire to bring us into the same and even greater love and joy of being at peace with God!

So before moving on today to the subject of my blog remember that when you pray to the angels that they hear you, they help you and they look at you with infinite love and respect and will help you.

All that aside yesterday I went to the cathedral for mass after which I bumped into a friend of mine called Brenda who then very generously invited me for lunch…

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We got talking about many things and especially our up and coming Medjugorje ministry to the gay community.

She told me many stories of when she used to go to masses years ago for gay people to pray for them (she’s not gay) and some of the abuse she got!

“I’ll stick my penis up your ar#e” said one guy in anger.

Once again the conflict and lack of love that not only has been shown to gay people but how gay people too have often been very abusive to other people who do not understand their situation.

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It is a very difficult balance to find to welcome communities such as the gay community into the church and at the same time to calling them like everyone to lives of prayer and holiness.

Welcome everyone with no call to prayer and the church becomes much like a pub or restaurant where God is excluded much like this former church that we stumbled upon last Sunday after mass….

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On the other hand if one is too severe with prayer and church rules then nobody will come and gay people or indeed any group of people will simply feel that God is an unreasonable tyrant with standards that are too high!

And so the middle ground of being prayerful and at the same time understanding and pastoral is very difficult to find which us why we need help from someone who knows what they are doing……

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Our Lady of Medjugorje to the rescue!

Queen of peace, mother of humanity, apostle of love….

Who better to lead us and guide us?!

Our Lady is a mother to us all from the gay community to the straight community to the conservative church folk to the liberal church folk…..Many people, many ideas but ONE MOTHER!

Whichever group we fall into it doesn’t matter because we are all being called to the same thing; loving God and loving eachother.

Over the years church people have hurt gay people and gay people have hurt church people. Not because either group is evil but because both groups have felt both hurt, misunderstood and disrespected by eachother.

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As Queen of peace Our Lady wants to bring peace and love, patience and understanding, healing and deliverance to both groups and she will do that by bringing our hurting and fearful hearts to the peaceful and loving heart of her son Jesus.

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In Jesus whoever we are or whatever our beliefs or orientation or whatever will we all find love, forgiveness, humility and reconciliation.

All walls of hatred will be broken down and love, mercy and peace will reign!

And so dear readers, please do pray for this very special and extraordinary ministry that will not only bring healing to many gay people, but will reunite broken families and broken church communities.

Our Lady of Medjugorje, pray for us!

Michael

It’s raining here in London and as I have a coffee I see many long faces! I feel like shouting “cheer up you miserable lot, we’re alive and Jesus loves us” but I don’t think that would be wise.

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Yesterday Our Lady continued her messages to me about prayer, mercy and mission. Yesterday’s was more mission focused and here is what she said:

“Our Lady 

My child,

Be not afraid.

My son’s greatest and most magnificent attribute is his mercy. He is mercy by his very nature and his greatest desire is to make his mercy known and experienced.

Mercy by its very nature is attracted to misery and weakness and to those who are helpless.

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As apostles of God’s love and mercy isn’t it normal to be called and sent to those souls who are the most in need of hope and healing?

How many are those souls who though rich in merits and graces refuse to be sent out to help others. They are like animals hibernating for the winter, storing up food and thinking only of their own survival.

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Jesus did not think of his life or wellbeing in order to help and save others.

In reaching across boundaries and borders he demonstrated the limitless and fearless love of God and ultimately by giving his life he choose the poor and needy over the proud and self-righeous.

I my children supported him, loved him and encouraged him as he shared the mercy that I had already received with others.

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Now my children I ask you to do the same. I send you out just like the Holy Spirit sent Jesus and I out and then the apostles and countless missionaries down through the centuries.

Be not afraid my children. Continue to pray and meditate on the mysteries of the rosary and allow yourselves to be guided and led by me.

Fear not those who oppose you but trust and offer your sufferings to Jesus in reparation for the sins of the world.“

Today’s message is challenging! Our Lady is calling us to be strong and to be generous and to be her apostles of love.

As usual the main obstacle to this is fear. Fear of not knowing what to say or do, fear of demons, fear of what other people might think or say …

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And yet Our Lady isn’t sending us out alone because she’s asking us to pray the rosary and so she herself will be with us!!

She’s also warning us of opposition!! I could certainly write that book but she’s also telling us how to handle it and to keep on going on our mission.

And so today whoever or wherever you are, invite Our Lady to take you by the hand and to teach you how to break down the fears and barriers that prevent you from reaching out more to others.

Think of the group of people that you can’t stand the most (hey, it might be us gays!!) and ask yourself “how could I love them and hear their story?”.

Put away your rosary beads and prayer books for a few hours and allow your hearts to lead and if you don’t know what to say then simply start with “hello, how are you?”.

Have a super day!

Michael

Good afternoon everyone!

Yesterday we had a fantastic time at Peter and Richard’s party in Pall Mall.

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That’s my friend Peter in the middle. For more photos have a look at this little video…

Anyway today I was up and about early and even managed a gym class before mass despite having drank quite a bit of champagne last night.

The gospel reading at mass and the readings really hit a chord with me. In the readings two people began prophecying unexpectedly and some of those that saw this ran to Moses to stop them immediately!

Moses did the opposite and exclaimed that it’d be great if everyone prophesied!!

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Then in the gospel reading people whom the disciples didn’t know were casting out demons in Jesus name and again the disciples came running to Jesus complaining and wanting them stopped!!.

Jesus did the opposite!

These readings reminded me of my life with Séamus and Toni with so many people cribbing and groaning about our ministry of healing and evangelisation because Jesus selected us in an unusual way!

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How many times now have we heard that we must be following demons or that we can’t be doing the ministry that we are doing in the way that Jesus has taught us?!

Certainly it’s unusual perhaps for Jesus to use gay and transgender people but why not?! Aren’t we as much God’s children as anyone else?!

It’s also funny on facebook! If we were reaching out to orphans in India and had lots of heart wrenching pictures of us holding starving children I’m sure that we’d get a great following but when we post pictures of us mingling and bringing Jesus into the heart of the gay community we receive minimal support and maximum grumbling behind our backs!!

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And yet Our Lady and Jesus continue to move us on in extraordinary ways and we continue our ministry of evangelisation regardless of what people think!

My prayer today is for those who think we are following demons or that we are possessed by the devil!

May they see the devil of hatred and envy in their own hearts and repent from their gossiping and help us on our mission of bringing the healing love of Jesus to the gay community.

Off now to the LGBT welcoming mass sr Farm street!

Have a super evening and please keep us in your prayers.

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Michael

Good morning!!

Today I’m so excited because we are going to a party in Pall Mall. This is the venue!!

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It’s my friend from the gym (Peter)’s civil partnership party and he invited the lot of us gay Jesus lovers!!

Only yesterday did he call me to tell me that with his partner he sat at the back of the church for 5 minutes and prayed and we often have the most wonderful conversations about God.

The mission of Jesus’ divine mercy is exactly this, to reach out in love to people who have never heard of it and who are unlikely to ever even walk into a church.

As the church we must go out and bring the divine mercy to others and this afternoon is going to be an excellent opportunity to do just that!!

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Peter has told me that there will be such a variety of people at this party from multi millionaires to the poor! He really has an extraordinary gift of networking and he treats everyone with love and respect.

From what I gather most will not be christian so it’s guaranteed to be fun from an evangelisation point of view!

Yesterday we went to a divine mercy mass in Ealing and I prayed for Peter and also about a much more practical matter….what on earth to wear??!!

I like me £5 red hoodie but I’m not sure it’d be a hit at Pall Mall!!

Jesus answered my prayer. Peter called me last night and said that he was aware that I might not have anything to wear and may not be able to buy something and so he offered to lend me an outfit!!!

Bingo!!! What better way to go to the ball and speak about the love and joy of Jesus than with a big smile and a ridiculously over the top pink suit?!!!

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A few years ago I would never have dared to wear such a thing but the power of Jesus and how much he has healed me has given me a confidence and a boldness beyond my wildest dreams!

And this is exactly what God wants for each one of us! He wants us to be free and at the same time to love and adore him, the author of it all!!

And this is what Our Lady told me yesterday too in her latest message:

“Our Lady 

Continue to write my child!

Yesterday I explained to you how through the rosary I desire to transform you all into perfect creatures pleasing to God in every way!

This my little ones is the action of grace, of the sanctifying grace of Jesus poured out on all humanity through the power of the Holy Spirit.

The first and greatest benefactor of this mercy was me, your little mother because destined to be God’s most magnificent creature I was in the greatest need of His grace.

Had God not spared me or original sin and its effects I would have been just like you my children. It is through no merit of my own that I was given this extraordinary privilege but through an extraordinary act of God’s mercy!

And so you see as I held my infant son and as I saw him die on the cross many years later I was so very aware that not only was he my son but that he was my saviour!

This is why I desire to bring you all to Jesus my son and teach you to love him, to adore him and to accept and receive the free gift of his mercy as I have.

Jesus desires to free you all, to pour our his grace on you and bring you into perfect union with him like he has done for me.

Come my children closer and closer to my motherly heart and I will bring you to his mercy.“

Our Lady so desperately desires us to be free and happy like she is and she knows that the source of that freedom and happiness is not to be found at Pall Mall or in having millions but is to found in the merciful heart of Jesus!

She also knows that so many have never heard of Jesus and though they may be rich and wealthy in the eyes of this world, they are the poor in her eyes and desperately need the transforming touch of Jesus.

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And so today as Séamus, Toni, Rayne and I head off to the ball we are praying and trusting that we can be Our Lady’s lights of love and mercy and bring the love, light, hope and mercy of Jesus to Pall Mall and all it’s guests!!

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“Our Lady, greatest benefactor of Jesus’ mercy, teach us to trust more and to spread the love and joy of Jesus to all whom we meet!”.

Have a great day!!

Michael

P.S. I made a mistake yesterday. Today is Fr Keith’s birthday and not yesterday as I said so you can pray for him and bless him all over again today!! God bless Fr Keith, one of Our Lady’s chosen apostles of the love and mercy of Jesus to all!

It’s Friday and I don’t know about you but I’m in great form! Yesterday after mass at the Cathedral I was spoilt rotten by another surprise birthday lunch.

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Our Lady has a special way of putting people around me to love me, help me and encourage me and I’ve often noticed how women are often far more open to the ways of Our Lady than men.

In any case I’m very thankful to God for all these wonderful people, both men and women who have helped me and supported me in so many different ways down through the years. May the Lord bless each one a thousand fold!

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After lunch I came home and once again I received another beautiful message from Our heavenly mother. Over the last week or so she’s been teaching us a lot about love and prayer and so it will come as no surprise that today she continues the same theme and talks of the rosary….

“Our Lady 

My children,

Yesterday I called you to loving me and making me loved in the world.

The more you love me, the more you will forget yourself and do what pleases me and what pleases me is for you all to please God!

So yes, that’s right, loving me more will bring you to loving God more because I love God perfectly as a created being of his and so am in a perfect position to teach each one of you how to love God and be fully alive in the Spirit.

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How do you learn this my child but by imitation just as little children learn their first language.

And because I’m not with you physically, I invite you to meditating and thinking about my life through the rosary.

Yes, the rosary is the most powerful and privileged way of getting to know and love me and getting to know and love God.

To get the most out of the rosary you must pray and meditate on the different mysteries slowly, being mindful of inspirations and thoughts from the Holy Spirit at all times.

Allow the recitation of the rosary to be a source of love and joy for you rather than duty and work.

How I love when my children lift up their hearts to me. How can I resist feeding their souls like a mother bird feeding her young?!

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Through the rosary you will learn to become more docile to the Holy Spirit and so you will ward off Satan and his army of demons far more easily.

The rosary will also teach you wisdom, discernment and give you supernatural strength for your mission and life.

If possible pray the rosary in front of the Blessed Sacrament where Jesus is present appearing as bread.

Never fear asking me for what you need in the rosary, trusting that I will provide if it is for your good!”

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What a beautiful invitation from Our Lady to pray and to grow stronger and stronger in the ways of God and holiness through the rosary.

Wishing you all a very holy and prayer day and let’s spare a special prayer for Monsignor Keith Baltrop who celebrates his birthday today! May Our Lady bless him in ways unimaginable as he enjoys a well deserved holiday overseas.

Michael

Good morning and happy feast day of one of my favourite saints who I always call my spiritual director, Padre Pio!!

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There is so much we can all learn from Padre Pio from his battles with demons to the stigmatas he bore for 50 years despite some in the church thinking he was either mad or possessed or both!

Yes! Pio and I have become good friends over the years and I owe a lot of that to my mum who told us a lot about him as children and would always pray to him when she needed something ……and even though I didn’t understand how it worked….it worked!!!

Yet something else that I discovered about Pio once I began to read about him was his very great horror of sin and love for Our Lady. He was a simple man in a way utterly focused on bringing people to Jesus no matter what the cost.

Yesterday I went to lunch with a friend who too has given her entire life to bringing people into the heart of Jesus and out of the grip of Satan.

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She doesn’t have stigmatas and if you say her walking down the street you wouldn’t know but Brenda is a real warrior for Jesus and like Pio, a great lover of Our Lady.

Brenda doesn’t shy away from loving people either and she has become good friends with Séamus, Toni and I here in London and has never rejected us or treated us differently or badly in account of being gay.

In fact she has shown us so much love and support and has taken the time to get to know us and ask us questions about our lives without judging us.

Brenda is certainly an example of love and prayer and is most certainly one of Our Lady of Medjugorje’s “apostles of love” and I hope that Padre Pio blesses her with extra special graces today.

Anyway, that aside yesterday Our Lady spoke to me again about her role and her desire to be loved by us….

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“My little children,

How I desire to see you all strong in love and truth and yet how weak and fragile so many of you are.

Yesterday my children I explained that not everybody in my son’s church loves me.

This makes my motherly heart very sad because I not only love you all, I am here to help and guide you all.

Those who do not love me do not listen to me and so easily get lost and confused.

For some my messages are too simple, for others they are too demanding while for others it is not acceptable that I should choose to speak through ordinary human beings.

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Whatever the reason it is always Satan causing division and keeping souls away from my heart.

My children, I am your mother. This is not simply a theological fact to be believed or studied but it’s a spiritual and real reality that must be lived with the heart.

So many books have been written about me and yet what my heart yearns for the most is not your studies but your love.

To souls who love me I will reveal secrets found in no books and understanding beyond what any theologian could reveal. After all, apart from God who knows more about me than my own self?

How foolish to get lost in studies and to neglect love. You will not take your studies with you when you die but you will take your love!

How can souls call me the mother of God and yet refuse to love me? How will they love me as their mother in heaven if they have refused to love me on earth?

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How can they say that they love God and then refuse to love the mother that God has given them in me?

My little ones, it is not hard. Souls who do not love me have been deceived and need much prayer to see the error of their ways.

Do not be afraid of loving me like a little child no matter what your age or position. Do not be afraid of being mocked or ridiculed or considered foolish for your simple love.

Teach other souls how to love me and about my special role in these times. Teach them about Medjugorje and my motherly cry for prayer and reparation.

Pray for those who do not listen but do not give up hope or allow yourself to be discouraged because the victory of my heart is assured.”

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And so today with the intercession of Padre Pio we pray that Our Lady will be loved more and we pray that the Holy Spirit will raise up more and more apostles of love to spread the graces of Medjugorje to corners and spaces in both the church and the world where they has not yet been received.

Our Lady of Medjugorje, pray for us!

Michael

Good morning from London again! Brighton was great even if we were only there for a day. Here is a little video that Rayne did:

As soon as we jumped on the bus at 6.20 I looked at my phone and how pleasantly surprised I was to see adoration live streaming from Medjugorje after which Our Lady began to talk to me again!

At times I smile because my life is so unorthodox! I mean I’ve never heard of a gay catholic visionary or mystic or madman or whatever people should choose to call me who hears heaven speaking to him everywhere from the church to the pub!!

And yet why not? The kingdom of heaven is within us due to our baptism and I’m gay because my ministry is to gay people and Jesus talks to me everywhere because he sends me off evangelising

So things are not as upside down as they might seem, just different!

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And so seeing the funny side I must be merciful to those who think I’m nuts or refuse me the sacraments and yet at the same time challenge them to pulling up their socks and expanding their understanding of Jesus and the ways of the Holy Spirit.

Here is what Our Lady, our mother had to say yesterday!

“Our Lady 

My little child, recently I have been explaining to you how I desire you to be like warriors and to win for heaven many many souls that are so far away.

Warriors my child must be strong! They must be strong in prayer, strong in faith and most importantly strong in love.

Only to the degree that each one of you know in your hearts that you are loved will you be able to pass on this love to others.

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Even Jesus while in the middle of his ministry and public life spent very much time alone in prayer.

How much more time alone do you my little warriors need to spend to grow ever closer to the Father and to get more healing for your inner wounds and wounds inflicted on you from your ministries.

You need my little children a shelter, a bunker where you can go for protection and recuperation.

I my children am your shelter and my immaculate heart is your bunker.

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This is why I speak of the triumph of my immaculate heart because all the forces of hell have no power over me.

As my immaculate heart rises like the morning sunshine it dispels the darkness!

I am calling you my chosen ones to be in my heart where no harm will touch you because I am protecting you personally.

Tell my children the souls whom you meet about the protection of my heart, tell them to consecrate their hearts to mine, tell them how much I love them and want to save them.

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Be not afraid of opposition my little ones, even in my son’s church where many do not love me and refuse to heed my appeals.

Pray for those who refuse to listen, who laugh at you and mock you in account of me.

Let those of you who love me and listen to my call love and support eachother because you are brothers and sisters. Together we form a family, a family of love and prayer and truth.

Be always ready to forgive eachother less division sets in and above all let others see the love that you have for eachother so that it may be a testimony to them.“

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Another beautiful message of Our Lady with a calling as usual to prayer, to love, to perseverance and most of all to trusting in her and in the power of her immaculate heart which will triumph.

May we all be true soldiers and children of Mary, humbly loving her and bringing as many souls as possible to know her and love her and find the peace and refuge that they need in her most wonderful loving, tender and immaculate heart.

Blessings of love to all!

Michael

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We’re up bright’n early here in Brighton by the sea!

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Just 3 hours from London and less than £10 return thanks to the good old National Express.

And yet before leaving yesterday I had a bit of a battle in Soho where I went to mass and confession.

The church where I wanted to go was closed and so I ended up going to St. Patrick’s in Soho square. It’s a beautiful church and they do lots of good work for the homeless but there certainly is no great love, understanding or outreach to the massive gay community of Soho.

This in itself is sad because of the location and yesterday Jesus let me experience first hand the discrimination and hurt when after humble going to confession the priest refused me absolution!

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It was not the parish priest but a visiting priest who I met last year and after confessing my sins which had nothing to do with Rayne he said “you can’t have a partner”.

So on the grounds that I wasn’t going to dump Rayne, he wouldn’t give me absolution!!

I told him that I’d never been refused absolution in 14 years, that I wouldn’t be on my knees confessing my sins if I wasn’t sorry and genuine and that in confession I was expecting to meet the understanding and loving heart of God rather than to be humiliated and shamed!

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All to no avail. He didn’t want to listen, he didn’t want to know and as far as he was concerned he knew my soul better than either me or God!!

Anyway, I was quite pleased with myself that I remained firm but calm and as he walked off and left me in the box alone, I felt a deep presence of Jesus with me and once again the terrible pain inflicted on the gay community by well-meaning and yet cold and hard-hearted church folk.

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To be perfectly honest if something like this happened to me in a parish up in the mountains in the Irish countryside I would be surprised in this day and age …but for it to happen in the middle of Soho in one of the world’s largest cities is ridiculous.

Only yesterday was I reading this article:

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https://www.newwaysministry.org/2021/09/20/irish-archbishops-encourage-lgbtq-outreach-amid-major-decline-in-church-life/

It does make me very sad that there is no proper outreach to the gay community of Soho.

This is not to take away from all the good work of helping the homeless but in some ways helping the homeless is easy! It’s not controversial, it’s the obvious poverty and nobody will criticise you for giving a homeless guy a sandwich.

On the other hand, helping the gay community will bring enormous controversy and problems and criticism…

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In any case I won’t hold my breath waiting for an apology because for all the sermons on humility, one thing I’ve noticed over the years as that most priests rarely say sorry….at least not to the people they hurt.

And so as I finish my breakfast here in Brighton I thank God for this first hand experience of rejection and discrimination which further helps me to articulate and describe the plight of gay Catholics

I am also grateful that I have been asked to represent our parish in the Synod process which is beginning where I hope to be able to share my concerns about outreach to the gay community.

So praise God, even the difficult experiences get turned into something good and let’s pray for this priest who I met yesterday that as well as learning english, he also learns of the tender and merciful heart of the Father for the gay community.

Have a great day and pray for me too to stay strong!

Michael