Are you one of those people that doesn’t like eating alone or walking into a bar or a restaurant on your own?
Do you feel that there is a sign over your head reading “loser with no friends”?
As I sit here on my own this lunchtime I reflect just how much Jesus has changed my life.
Rayne is away for a few days enjoying the Cottswald area and while I’d like to have gone it just wasn’t possible this time and so I’m having a quick lunch on my own for the first time in ages!
Ironically I used to be one of those people that would never go to a bar or restaurant on my own or if I did I’d be acutely conscious of others around me who actually had friends.
What changed you may ask?
Jesus is the answer.
Before having Jesus in my life I didn’t know where to look or what to do during those awkward moments when I was alone but when Jesus arrived everything changed because he’d talk away to me no matter where I was.
Perhaps in hindsight this is how God was training me to hear his voice because I spent endless hours alone and ate alone all over the world for years.
Living on providence and being gay while seeing spirits made sure that any any given time that I had few friends, it was too much for most people to handle and it still is for many and yet into this void came Jesus, the friend of weirdos!
Of course at times I still struggle with my life and this unusual calling that God has given me that makes me different from other people. Some days I’d just like to be “normal”, for it all to stop, to check out!
People can be cruel and insensitive and at times one feels invisible.
People get used to you speaking of spiritual things and living on providence and soon enough they become immune! It’s like some have not only had a Covid 19 vaccination but also a Jesus vaccination.
One feels the pain of Jesus, alive but ignored, spiritual but disregarded and one understands that the spirit of this world really wants nothing to do with any mention of God.
At times when one does mention God one is accused of being negative and spoiling the fun, after all who wants to hear of repentance or sin or prayer?!
And so where do we go when we are rejected and excluded by all and sundry because of out faith?
We turn to Jesus and we unite our struggle with his and we pay no attention to the evil spirit trying to sink us and we remind ourselves that we are loved and understood by God even if by nobody else.
We seek him in prayer, we receive him at mass and he will wipe our tears and strengthen us for the journey as we wait for the day that he will take us home and when we will be surrounded by the angels and saints in heaven and will no longer sit alone and invisible in a world that has rejected God.
And so let us be confident and go out and have that cup of tea or coffee on our own and let us show the world that it’s OK not to be popular, not to be the life and soul of the party and not to have many friends because we have the one friend that matters beyond all others, Jesus.